Tuesday, December 13, 2011

HERE'S WHAT'S MISSING FROM LINDSAY LOHAN'S 'PLAYBOY' PICS: After the LINDSAY LOHAN 'Playboy' pictorial popped up online late last week, HUGH HEFNER decided to push up the issue's availability to this Friday.

But, of course, by the end of the day yesterday almost everyone who cared to peep the pics already had. And most were shocked (shocked!I tells you) to find the pictures have been Photoshopped to the max. Most notably her tatts.

In real life, she's got the Billy Joel lyrics, "Clear as a crystal, sharp as a knife I feel like I'm in the prime of my life," inked on her rib cage, "La bella vita" on her butt, and the Marilyn Monroe quote, "Everyone's a star and deserves the right to twinkle" on her forearm.

Also airbrushed away were assorted hand and wrist tattoos. In addition, the freckly Lohan has been de-freckled in some of the pictures.

E! GOING TO DALLAS WITH KHLOE AND LAMAR: This shouldn't come as much of a surprise -- TMZ reports that when KHLOE KARDASHIAN and LAMAR ODOM move to Dallas, now that Lamar has been traded to the Mavericks, the E! cameras will be moving with them.

Word is the couple's move to Texas will be a major plot line on the next season of "Khloe and Lamar". As for the move itself, Khloe told E! News she "can't wait to...get to know the city and all the wonderful people there."

MARC ANTHONY WON'T ALLOW JLO'S BOYFRIEND TO DRIVE THE KIDS: MARC ANTHONY has banned JENNIFER LOPEZ'S boyfriend from driving his children anywhere.

According to Radar Online, Marc laid down the law after finding out Casper Smart has been arrested for drag racing. A source said, "Marc went ballistic when he found out about Casper's criminal record. He explicitly told Jen that Casper wasn't allowed to drive their children anywhere."

The gossip site's source adds that if Jen doesn't play ball,"[Marc} will go straight to family court [and]get a judge involved to make sure Casper doesn't get behind the wheel with his kids in the car."

Smart has reportedly been arrested twice for speeding and driving on a suspended license.

ASHTON KUTCHER'S SIDE ACTION WOULD LIKE YOU TO KNOW IT RUINED HER LIFE TOO: Sara Leal, the chick who bumped uglies with ASHTON KUTCHER on the night of his sixth wedding anniversary, would like you to know DEMI MOORE wasn't the only victim of his trifling ways. It ruined HER life TOO.

Sara says that after the story broke she got a lot of disturbing phone calls, lost her job, lost her best friend and was even shunned by her father. But more importantly, she would like you to know that she is NOT a ho.

She says, quote, "When people say to me, 'I can't believe you did that,' I want to say back that most 22-year-old girls in my position would have done the same thing." Lastly, Leal claims she didn't know Ashton was married.

NO ONE WANTS TONY BENNETT'S NAKED LADY GAGA SKETCH: On her Thanksgiving special, LADY GAGA revealed how TONY BENNETT sketched her "Titanic"-style for "Vanity Fair".

Well, now you can own that drawing. The sketch is for sale on eBay's new celebrity page, with proceeds going to Bennet's Exploring the Arts charity and Lady Gaga's Born This Way Foundation.

But as of this morning, no one has bid the minimum $5,000 reserve price. The auction will close next Monday.

SNAPSHOT: MILEY CYRUS took the girls out over the weekend ...


SPLITSVILLE - TYRA BANKS: TYRA BANKS has reportedly split from her boyfriend of three years, banker John Utendahl. According to The New York Post, Tyra's dealing with the break up by "island-hopping" with a female friend.

The ex is said to be dealing with things differently. The newspaper claims John was spotted out in NYC with a "leggy supermodel" this past weekend.

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